Force an Exhalation Through a Brass Wind Instrument
The diminutive melancholy juvenile male was vociferously summoned and
requested to force an exhalation through a brass wind instrument. The
atmospheric pressure waves thus induced would be interpreted as a meaningful
signal to the diverse forms of tame mammals raised in the immediate vicinity
to return to their respective places of caretaking. The reason for this is
that those animals drifted, leaderless, into a restricted area--a section of
land for which they needed authorization and accompaniment to enter; namely,
the bovine had entered a tract of moist, low-lying grassland, and the stocky,
beardless ruminant relative of the goat had introduced himself into a section
of land given over to the cultivation of a strain of Zea mays
saccharata or some close relative thereto.
However, from what coordinates is the young male overseeing the aforementioned
beasts? He is beneath a large heap of dried alfalfa, cured for fodder, and is
currently in a state of torpid inactivity, his consciousness deliberately
allowed to suspend itself. Do you desire (or can you be talked into) giving
him tactile, visual, or auditory stimulus of such intensity as to break
through the diminished sensibilities and cause the ego to regain conscious
control?
"Negative," the narrator replies, "I shan't. And the reason for that choice
is this: If I pursue the course of action you just outlined, there is
virtually a 100% probability that, due to his immaturity and outrage at being
chastised, he would burst into tears."
(translation)