The Aged and Decrepit Woman

The aged and decrepit woman who had borne at least one offspring approached the small, elevated closets in her kitchen which were wont to hold foodstuffs, intending to procure for the cur which resided in the same structure as she, a section of the calcified skeletal structure of, presumably, a large mammal, such as one from the kine group, so said cur could derive nutrients and/or pleasure from the violent mastication of that calcified skeletal portion. But upon arriving at her destination, the woman discovered, to her dismay, that the interior of the foodstuffs closet was devoid of skeletal sections--indeed, closer examination revealed the total absence of any sort of edibles! The obvious result of this development was that the aforementioned cur was prevented from engaging in the anticipated gustatory pursuits.

(translation)